Emotion: Energy in Motion
I grew up carrying a lot of emotions and not knowing if it was safe for me to express them. Having epilepsy with 3-4 daily seizures, I met a lot of frustration, disappointment and sadness. I didn't generally feel scared, but I feared the reactions I met when I expressed my emotions. Though I carried most of them around with me, I knew I had to face them to not be consumed by something I didn't want to be.
Reading Pen and Sword Journal: Practicing Emotional Judo, I was intrigued with emotion being defined as energy in motion. Over the years, I learned that not expressing negative emotions only weakened me physically and, for me, created more seizures. Though I didn't like myself in my worst state, I found that letting the storm take its course gave me release and made room for clarity. My revelations always came after a big storm and when I felt the worst, I knew to hold on to find out.
The first approach to dealing with emotions is to face it head on. I did this by letting the storm take its course. Though I didn’t enjoy what happened throughout the storm, I knew to hold on to learn. This led me to constantly go wherever fear told me not to. I lived to purposely dissect fear and find its truth. This is where I used the second approach of using my opponent indirectly. Fear became my discovery partner and helped me to find courage to face my emotions without judgment. After the reactive stage passed, I'd look back in a neutral state and try to see beyond the reaction. This set me up for my love of viewing everything from an outer perspective because I connected to more when I wasn't thinking under me or I.
Though emotions are within us and ours to own, I tend to view them as energy that we can separate ourselves from and we have the choice to follow the movement or change to resolve it. Whether our opponents are physical or internal, it’s up to us to meet them and find an understanding of their purpose.
Photo By: Gustavo Quepon https://unsplash.com/@unandalusgus
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