“Openly listen and hear the reasons out; don’t judge, just find out what it is all about.” -Astrid Hardjana-Large
We often form a personal expectation with the hope of gaining the things we want but this also leads us to make assumptions based on our outlook that leads us away from the truth. It is very important to rest our thoughts and open our communication when other people are involved.
Melissa is a young girl who is blessed to have two good friends, Amelia and Natasha. The three of them spend a lot of time together but Melissa wishes to have Amelia consider her as a best friend because she has more in common with Amelia. Melissa recalls the one day they spent together when the three of them were sharing their new markers together. Melissa wanted to give her markers to Amelia but Amelia seemed to want to do most of her sharing with Natasha. Natasha was very happy with Amelia and in the end, Melissa felt like she was being left out by both Amelia and Natasha. Melissa could not understand why they both disliked her so much. What had she done so wrong? Melissa was confused by Amelia’s preference for Natasha and she couldn’t understand why it felt like she had lost them both. Finally, Melissa found the courage to speak to both of her friends.
“Um, Amelia? Natasha? May I speak with you?” Melissa asked them.
They both nodded and Natasha said, “What’s up?”
“Do you guys still like me? Are we still friends?” Melissa asked.
“Of course we are. What makes you think that we are no longer friends?” Amelia questioned.
“Well, it felt that way when we were sharing our new markers the other day. Amelia, it looked like you only wanted to share with Natasha. You didn’t want to accept anything from me. Natasha, you only shared with Amelia. I thought that you two became best friends and didn’t want to know me anymore.”
Amelia placed her hand on Melissa’s shoulder. “No, that is not what it was. I offered Natasha my markers first because she loves all of the colours. I had some extra purple markers and I was saving them for you because we always love looking at all the purple together.”
Natasha said, ”I thought you guys didn’t want me as a friend. When Amelia offered me her markers, I felt that she still wanted me as a friend. That was why I was sharing with Amelia. I didn’t share with you because I felt that you didn’t want to share with me. Do you still like me?”
Melissa was speechless in the moment. She had not realized that she made Natasha feel this way and she had not known that Amelia was saving her favorite colour for her. “I’m sorry, Natasha. I did not mean for you to think that I didn’t want to share with you. I was excited to show Amelia my purple markers and see her purple markers, I forgot that you would also have purple. I had wanted to share my green markers with you. I didn’t share because I thought you were not interested.”
Amelia interjected by pulling Natasha and Melissa towards her into a hug. “Let’s make a promise. The three of us are going to be best friends forever. If ever we feel unsure, let’s always come back to each other and talk. We’re always going to be best friends forever, right?”
“Of course we are. Let’s seal our promise with a great big hug.” Amelia, Natasha and Melissa sealed their promise with a great big hug and from that moment on, they were the best of friends.