Defined by Epilepsy

When Epilepsy was a part of my daily life, I worked hard to not allow Epilepsy to define my person. I had 3 to 4 seizures daily that made me consider ways to prevent injuries but I never stopped my life because I did not want Epilepsy to control me.

Now my life has taken an odd turn. I went in for brain surgery and no longer have seizures but I had a stroke that took away the functions of the left side of my body. Some would say that Epilepsy is no longer a part of my life but, knowing that this stroke was a part of my journey to get rid of epilepsy, I am re-experiencing personal differences due to epilepsy. As I work to recover from my stroke, I am searching for the strengths I built from having epilepsy.

Epilepsy was a part of my life for 23 years. It is still a blessing that I do not have to worry about any unexpected falls but I honestly do not know myself anymore. As much as I worked to not have epilepsy define me, I accepted it as a part of me and now a part of me is missing.

All the experiences I went through to accept that having epilepsy was just a personal difference to accept is coming back as I have to accept that I have to recover in a wheelchair. As much as seizures are gone right now, this is still something due to having epilepsy and it is making me feel defined by epilepsy. As much as I do not want to be defined by epilepsy, it was a huge part of my life and the person I became. Having epilepsy was not truly a negative experience for my person. Epilepsy was a part of my journey that helped me to build my positivity and now I have to get to know myself without epilepsy, remember my lessons from epilepsy and rediscover my person.

Published by Astrid's Words

Astrid Hardjana-Large is an inspirational author who enjoys Life and adversity. She is motivated to share her inspiration from Life experiences and encourages readers to persevere on the journey of Life.

One thought on “Defined by Epilepsy

  1. Asrid, I feel the same about Epilepsy. It has just become part of me. It has provided motivation and positive thinking. I do wonder why me though. I sometimes think it would be interesting to take someones license away for a month and see how they enjoyed it. Just a month. My heart goes out to you with your recovery 🙂


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